Army wins, finishes 7-9-2 (.444)

The Red Army waited until the final game of the year to play their best. The Army defeated the Evil Empire, El Roco Buschwackers, 4-2 in a fast paced game. "The speed of the game was incredible, I thought I was going to have to get the AED out for Oly a couple of times," said coach Terry Paukert. The game was tight throughout. The game was tied at 1 after the first and at 2 after the second. The Army scored early in the 3rd to take command of the game. The Army then went into their classic defensive shell and held off a furious rally by El Roco. Shawn McMillan sealed the victory with an empty netter with 16 seconds left in the game. The Army was pleasantly surprised by the play of goalie Josh Gilbertson. Gilbertson had 10 saves in the game, the most he has had all season. "It only took Gilby 18 games to figure out how to save the puck, maybe next year we will have 8 wins if he has a good memory," screamed Steve Palmiscno. "We knew the game was going well for us when Perry Marto scored on a penalty shot. I guess his son Jake, who plays for the Sioux, show him a couple of things," quipped Lance Norman, who turned 44 yesterday. "I don't need any help from Jake, it was pure skill that allowed me to score," snapped Perry Marto. The Army post season award banquet will be soon. More details to come.

Finally the last game of the season

The Red Army will end its 2009-10 run to mediocrity as they face off with El Roco at 7:15 at the Eagles Arena. The Army will hope to get to 2 games below the .500 mark. The biggest worry about tonight is were the post game meal is. Rumor has it that Steve Olson is trying to line up the Golden Corral to cater the event. Media silence about the game was given to all Red Army personal. Call 1-800-REDARMY for tickets. I know it is a weak effort. But it has been a long season.

The eyes sum up the season!

Army Explodes For 6 in the Third!

The Red Army was all but dead after trailing 4-2 going into the third. But a challenge from goaltender Josh Gilbertson fueled the team to an 8-5 win over Gerrell's. "Gilby told us if we score 3 he would shut Gerrell's down. Well, we knew he would never live up to his end, so we scored 6," said Kurt Comeau, who ended the night with 4 goals and 1 assist. "What really helped us was the absences of Perry Marto, Mike Anderson and Lance Norman. We could actually get some rhythm with our lines," said Bill Knipe. "Marto who, McMillan won more faceoffs in the first period than Marto has won all year,' said Steve Palmiscno. Palmiscno continued, "Gilby still sucks, we should play without a goalie!" The season finally will end next week when the Army takes on the El Roco. On a side note Todd Schumacher notched his second goal of the year. "He should have had four last night. He had 3 point blank shots, he is almost as bad as Gilby!" said Steve Olson.

Game tonight at 5:45

The Red Army takes on Gerrell's tonight at 5:45 at the Gambucci Arena. The game will be televised on FSN with Frank Mazzacco and Doug Woog handling the commentary. Obviously these 2 have nothing else to do after the Gophers got bounced out of the WCHA tourney. The biggest question facing the Army tonight is what to do with Josh Gilbertson. Rumor has it that Gilbertson will be leaving after tonight's game to a goalie concentration camp in Moscow. President Vladimir Putin is not happy with his performance this year and will be training him personally. We are all hoping that Gilby's equipment is bulletproof! A media blackout was announce so no quotes from any of the players, coaches or front office were allowed. The Army is hoping to maybe get 2 more points before the year ends next week, non to soon for this reporter. After a promising first half, the Army has looked like the North Carolina basketball team this year. One can only hope that we can see a better effort next year. In order to get a big crowd into tonight's game. Free beer will be offered to anyone in attendance over the age of 21. Call 1-800-REDARMY for your tickets. There are a lot left!

Sad News to report

Kevin Kyle's mother,Evelyn, has passed away. Please keep Kevin and his family in your prayers.
Funeral is 1:00 on Thursday at University Lutheran.

Priceless

Going to a Red Army game- $1.00 in gas
Losing your lunch watching the old guys play- $2.00 in laundry soap
Watching Mike Anderson try to skate- Priceless

Army Losses in a shoot-out

The Red Army played its best defensive game of the year but still come up short in a shootout 2-1. The Game was tied at one after regulation. The Army appeared to have scored in the second, but the shot by Mike Anderson was review by video and was proven to hit the post. The Army almost accomplished their goal of not allowing any shots. The one shot they gave up did end up in the net. "We couldn't do anything with the shoot-out. We knew that the only way The GFAFB wouldn't score was if they missed the net," said Steve Palmiscno. "I don't know what Coach Paukert was thinking selecting Bill Knipe, Todd Schumacher and Todd Palmiscno to shoot for us. Those guys haven't scored in 2 months," quipped a ticked off Lance Norman. The best thing for the Army that the game will go down officially as a tie, so the 3 game losing streak is over. The Army only has 2 games left for the season. So make plans to get to the next game. Game time next Wednesday is 5:45 at the Gambucci versus Gerrell's.

Can the Army salvage the season?

The Red Army takes on the GFAFB tonight at 7:00 at the Eagles Arena. The Army' play has been abysmal to say the least. Giving up over 20 goals in their last three games. "The only way we will win tonight is not to give up any shots. Gilby can't stop a beach ball," said Perry Marto. "How about score some goals," answered a bewildered Josh Gilbertson. Gilbertson continue, "Most of these guys could throw in in the ocean from a small boat!" Coach Terry Paukert will have to do a little line juggling tonight, as Defensmen Steve Olson will be sitting out after dropping the gloves last week. "We will be ok, our depth at defense is good. I just wished it could have been Palmiscno or Schumacher sitting out." "The worst thing about Oly not playing he will most certainly be the first one at the post game party, there may not be any food left," said a disappointed Bill Knipe. Only 3 weeks left in the season. Don't miss out on some of the cheapest entertainment in town. Call 1-800-REDARMY for tickets.

Army losses game, Olson wins fight

The Red Army was manhandled by the El Roco last night 7-3. The Army held tough for the first half of the game. With the game tied at 3 midway through the game, goalie Josh Gilbertson went back to the goalie we know and love. Gilbertson actually had 11 saves for the first half of the game and then had 3 the rest of the way. Gilbertson was not help by the defensive pairing of Steve Olson and Chad Swendseid. "The looked like Schumacher and Palmiscno. Two orange pylons would have played better than those two," said coach Terry Paukert. There were two bright spots for the Army. Lance Norman continued his torrid scoring pace with a goal and an assist. "I'm just playing to help the team win," said a humbled Norman. "Hell, all he does is stand in front of the net and picks up my garbage," said a emotional Shawn McMillan. The highlight of the the game for the fans was a mammoth tilt between the two heavyweight on the Ice. The Army's Steve Olson went toe-to-toe with the El Roco Lee Kofstad. Te fight brought the 14 fans to their seats. The other players were glad that it took 3 minutes off the clock so they could rest. Scoring the fight was Angleo Dundee, 114-111 for Olson, The Fight Doctor, Freddy Pachecko, 113-112 for Kofstad, and Eddie Obergon, 114-112 for Olson. Brian Purcell was quoted after the fight, " Olson lucky he didn't have to go against Rochee." The Army the Base next week at 7:00 at the Eagles Arena. Will more fireworks erupt?

Will the Army win again

The Red Army takes on its arch rival,El Roco tonight at 6:00 at the Purpur. (Yes Shawn this is what the schedule says). It is no surprise that the Army needs to tighten up defensively against El Roco. "I guess we will have to improve giving up 15 shots per game. We will have to keep them under 10. We know teams are going to score on us at a 45% clip," said Coach Terry Paukert. Jerry Lundby of the El Roco said, "We know if we get 14 shots tonight we will 6 goals and put it out of reach. The only guy that we have to worry about is Lance Norman. He is the catalyst of the Army. We stop him, we win the game!" Coach Paukert answered back, "If we stop Rochee and Baron we win the game." The Army will have to win its final four games of the year to finish at the .500 mark. Even without the wins the Army has NO chance of moving up into another division. "We stink and we know it. We wouldn't as bad as we are if we goalie get a goalie to stop a puck," said Steve Olson. Very few tickets are available, call 1-800-REDARMY for yours.